Misadventures in KL Land

Fellow Toastmasters and guests, good evening.

I love to travel.

I have often fantasized of being sent out on a foreign business trip by a prestigious multinational company. This dream became a reality in September 2007, a week after I joined the technology team in a multinational bank. During that time, they were in the midst of a system implementation project in Kuala Lumpur and so I was deployed to help out.

Since it was my first time to travel for official business and alone in a country that I’ve never been to for 3 long weeks, I had my jitters. I didn’t know what to expect so, I over-prepared. A few weeks before the trip, I bought a brand new luggage, an entire wardrobe of new corporate attire from blouses, slacks, skirts, down to the shoes. I also brought along my “baon” consisting of half a dozen cups of instant noodles, packs of instant 3-in-1 drinks, chips and crackers. Of course, with the help of my mom. It was like I was going on a camping trip.

All my bags were packed and I was ready to go. On the Sunday of my departure, my flight got delayed by two hours and upon arriving at the Kuala Lumpur International Airport at around 10pm, I tried to follow my boss’ instructions to locate the airport limo counter after Immigration. But nowhere could I find it. So I just followed my instincts and proceeded in the general direction of where most passengers were headed until I saw a long queue for coupon taxi service. After an hour, I was able to board a budget taxi. It’s not exactly the limo service that my boss had described and definitely no porter service but who cares! I was tired and I wanted to settle down. Off we went and when I finally saw the brightly illuminated Petronas Twin Towers come into view, I knew I was almost home because I was told that the office building and the service apartment were just in the vicinity.

The work days quickly passed by and when the weekends came, I put on my “domestic” hat and attended to some household chores. And that was when a string of exciting misadventures had happened.

One Saturday, I was packing the contents of my luggage and suddenly, I couldn’t open the combination lock. I distinctly remembered setting it as 525 because it’s the birthday of my dad. Could I have changed the combination by accident? I tried several attempts but to no avail. I even tried the factory default setting of 000 but it just won’t work. I broke into a cold sweat. What should I do? It’s my brand new Voyager luggage, and I bought it for like 2000 bucks. Should I pry open the lock? How? Or maybe cut a slit on the side of the luggage? Uggh, that would be ugly. In the end, I told myself to calm down. Think Marilyn! Think hard! Alas, ting! A brilliant idea came to mind. My college Statistics lessons on probability came in handy. Since there are only 3 digits in the combination lock, then that means there are only 999 ways to open the lock. Since it was a weekend, I had some extra time. I sat on the edge of the bed and pulled the luggage against my lap and patiently tried out each combination starting from 001, 002 and so on. Finally at 120-something, I heard “click!” I was so relieved! I need not try out the remaining 800-something combinations anymore. And best of all, I get to preserve the brand new state of my Voyager luggage. Yehey! ☺

But that wasn’t the last of my lockout experience. One late evening, I ordered room service for dinner. The next morning, I carefully put the dishes and utensils onto the tray and placed it outside the room by the door. Because I wanted to make sure that everything is in order, I stepped too far out from the door and forgot to jam one foot to keep the door ajar. Thus, the door shut close and I was locked out from my own room. I said to myself “Oh no, not again!!!” I left my keycard inside! I felt like laughing and crying at the same time. It’s as if I was on an episode of “Wow Mali!”. Good thing wearing sheer nightgowns wasn’t part of my sleeping gear. I was wearing my good ol’ reliable T-shirt, jogging pants and slippers so I simply went down the elevator and calmly explained my predicament to the reception lady at the lobby. She was kind enough to escort me all the way up to my room at the 16th floor. From then on, I swore to never to get locked out again.

There was another unforgettable blooper that I made while doing another domestic stint. Part of business travel practice is to do laundry for our inner garments and house clothes via the apartment’s self-service laundrette.

One afternoon, I piled all my used clothes into the big plastic laundry basket, prepared some small bills and brought my own Tide washing machine-ready detergent powder and off I went to the elevator, excitedly pushing the 4th floor button. When I reached the self-service laundry room, I saw rows of washing machine units to my right and dryers stacked on top of each other to my left. One requires 4 MYR coins to operate the machines and so I had to approach the cashier at the convenience store located on the same floor for loose change.

I took the opportunity to ask the cashier lady to teach me how to operate the washing machine. There were instructions in English but then I wanted to make sure. So I survived the washing part, which lasted for 40 minutes. Now comes the drying part. This time, I thought I’d figure it out on my own. I loaded my still-wet clothes on the top dryer and loaded coins onto the coin slot in the middle section, turned the knob and pressed the start button. To my surprise, the top dryer didn’t run and instead, the bottom dryer unit which was empty started moving. I hurriedly went to the cashier lady and asked how to make it stop. She shook her head and said I would have to wait for it to stop on its own and that’s like another 40 minutes. I felt like I just lost a game. Good bye 4 ringgits! But I wasn’t about to let it happen just like that. So I opened the bottom dryer door and viola, the machine halted for a moment. I quickly transferred the contents from the top dryer to the bottom dryer. Upon closing the door, the machine resumed its process. I congratulated myself for thinking on my feet. I got away with it!

A few weeks later, I had another tumble drying stint. This time, I’ve already made a mental note to load the coins on the opposite side of the slot which I did so but then for some reason, I placed my wet clothes on the bottom dryer unit. So, when I pressed the start button, it activated the top dryer unit with the already dried clothes of somebody else. I was tempted to switch my contents with the other person’s but I can just imagine the puzzled look on that person’s face upon seeing that his clothes have magically been moved to another unit. So, I just left things as is and decided I’m going to grant that stranger another round of drying service for free. And I proceeded to load the correct dryer unit with coins. Talk about being smart. Maybe I was just under a lot of stress at work back then. Again, I got to laugh at myself.

So from experiencing a series of lockouts from my luggage to my apartment room, to loading the coins on the wrong dryer twice, these are just some of the misadventures I had while I was in KL land. I can still recall what my engineering professor in college would always say just right before our exam, “You may look up for inspiration, or look down in desperation, but you may not look to your sides in search for an answer.” During those blooper moments, I would just shake my head in momentary frustration and give a hearty laugh afterwards. After all, they say that laugher is the best medicine.

So, when was the last time you had a good laugh on yourself?

Toastmaster of the Evening, fellow toastmasters and guests. Good evening.

-taken from my Basic Speech Project #5-

The Driver’s Seat

(Sing a stanza of Lea Salonga’s “The Journey”)
“What a journey it has been
And the end is not in sight
But the stars are out tonight
And they're bound to guide my way”

Fellow Toastmasters and Guests, good evening.

Robert Fulghum, author of “All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarden” said in his book that all he really need to know about HOW TO LIVE and WHAT TO DO and HOW TO BE he learned in kindergarden. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate-school mountain, but there in the sandpile at Sunday School.

Among the things he learned are:
• Share everything.
• Play fair.
• Don't hit people.
• Put things back where you found them.
• Clean up your own mess.
• Don't take things that aren't yours.
• Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.

Makes perfect sense, huh?

Well for me, I picked up bits and pieces of wisdom about life from sitting in the driver’s seat.
I learned to drive formally through a driving institute the same year that I graduated from high school, and informally, through my dad who had accompanied me on my test drives. But I officially learned to drive independently when I entered school around six years back because of the obvious convenience of mobility. It was a major breakthrough for me and looking back now, I’m glad I did that because it had taught me some valuable lessons in life and helped me cope with life’s challenges.

It was while I was driving that I encountered several “aha!” moments and I’d like to share a few with you:

1st: OBSERVE TRAFFIC RULES.

The traffic lights system was designed to promote order on the road. The rule is simple – GO when you see GREEN, STOP when you see RED, and PREPARE TO STOP when you see YELLOW. But do we really interpret is as how it was meant to be interpreted? Does seeing the warning YELLOW light trigger us to SLOW DOWN or actually SPEED UP? Some people choose to interpret it depending on their moods. They go faster when they are running late on their appointments and tend slow down when they are not in a rush. Yes, I am guilty of this on few accounts and not surprisingly, I don’t get away with it 100% scot-free. I occasionally miscalculate the timing of the changing of the lights and find myself getting flagged down by the men in pink. Thus goes the lengthy process of explaining and justifying my actions to authority. Definitely not an experience I’d like to relish. But isn’t it just like life? Sometimes you see potential trouble ahead, warning signs are everywhere and yet you still chose to do things your way instead of following basic instructions.

2nd: TAKE THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED.

Sometimes, the long cut is actually a short cut.

There was a time when I went home regularly at around ten-thirty-ish for four straight Wednesdays coming from Makati. I live in Manila near UST area and coming from Vito Cruz Extension, my favorite route home was to turn right to South Superhighway and go all the way to Nagtahan flyover. Why? Well because there are occasions that I reach home in 20-25 minutes with this route especially when I do fly-driving.

However, during those particular Wednesday evenings, because of the truck ban that had been lifted, I find myself contending with the trucks for road domination in my favorite route. Movement is at a painstakingly slow turtle-like pace and it can take me forever to reach home. My alternative route was to take Vito Cruz going to Taft because despite the presence of traffic lights in several intersections, there are no mean, nasty trucks hovering over you! But this realization to take a detour often comes out quite late…it only strikes me only after I’ve made a turn to South Superhighway.

So lesson to be learned, one should be dynamic enough to adapt to according to the road condition. Take the road less traveled. The additional kilometers may actually get you home faster.

3rd: SIGNAL BEFORE CHANGING LANES.

It is infinitely frustrating when a jeepney suddenly cuts you off when you are just peacefully sticking to your own lane. It is a gross disrespect!

Just like in relationships or at work, communication is essential. Whenever you know that a certain change or action would potentially affect others, have the decency and common courtesy to warn people ahead of time.

Thus, when I drive, I always glance at the rearview mirror, check for a safe distance of the next car on the lane I’m moving to, switch on my signal lights, before changing lanes. I don’t want to be the cause for casualty nor become a casualty myself. As they say, “casualness breed casualty”.

Fulghum may have found his wisdom in kindergarden but since I was a late bloomer, I had found mine when I started sitting in the driver’s seat.

(con’t) “When they're shining on my life
I can see a better day
I won't let the darkness in
What a journey it has been”

Toastmaster of the Evening, fellow toastmasters and guests. Good evening.

-taken from my Basic Speech Project #4-

My Peace of Mind

Ladies and Gentlemen, Fellow Toastmasters and Guests, good evening.

“What do you want most out of life?”

This is the icebreaker question that I’ve heard for countless times during the orientation session of a certain seminar company that offers leadership success seminars.

I am a proud graduate of the PSI seminars and each time I attend their coffee orientation with a guest, I am asked to introduce myself with this seemingly simple question. Interestingly enough, my answer varies every time. It goes something like this - “I want to travel the world” or “I want to be financially free” or “I want realize my full potential”. But after a few more visits, my answer has evolved to something more concise. I would reply: “What I want most out of life is to have peace of mind”.

What exactly is “peace of mind”? Is this something that only the elderly and dying pursue? Certainly not. I’d be willing to bet that each one of you in this room had given this concept some serious thinking at least once in your life, especially during your most challenged times.
In the horror flicks, “peace of mind” to the main character could mean being able to sleep peacefully at night. In Lion King, it is best described in two words “Hakuna Matata”, meaning no worries. In wikipedia, “peace of mind” is defined as absence of mental stress or anxiety, and simply put, inner peace.

In the PSI seminars, “peace of mind” means having balance in the 4 dimensions of man --PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL, MENTAL, and SPIRITUAL -- thereby achieving success. It is illustrated through the Peace of Mind square wherein each side represents one dimension.

• PHYSICAL pertains to HEALTH. When you are not tied to a dextrose and you have the strength to attend a Toastmasters meeting, then you could safely say that you are healthy.
• EMOTIONAL pertains to PERFECT SELF-EXPRESSION. That is, your facial muscles are consistent with what you are feeling. You laugh when you’re happy, you frown when you’re sad, you say what you mean, and you mean what you say.
• MENTAL pertains to WEALTH, both tangible such as money and intangible such as knowledge, skills, or talents.
• SPIRITUAL pertains to AGAPE or UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. I’d say that delivering a speech in Toastmasters is an act of agape in itself because you share a part of yourself to virtual strangers even if you run the risk of being judged.

I have since then adopted PSI’s definition of peace of mind. Now I wish to share five techniques on how to achieve this state.

1st, KEEP YOUR COMMITMENTS. This involves being consistent in thoughts, words, and deeds. Deliver what you’ve committed or else, a little voice at the back of your head will nag you until you take action. You see, everytime you ignore that little voice, you are actually deducting points from your self-esteem scale.

Being on time for your appointments is one way of keeping your commitments. It also a sign of respect for other people’s time.

2nd, DELAY GRATIFICATION. I recall a Chinese idiom that my Grade 5 Chinese teacher taught us -- “Xien Ku Hou Le”. It literally means, “First Bitter, Last Happiness”. Loosely translated, it means delaying gratification. Fight the urge to give in to instant pleasures, pause for a while, and reflect how a certain action would affect you tomorrow.

Allow me to relate this to Toastmasters context. In all honesty, I would rather sit down and observe people deliver speeches because it’s less stressful that way. But I also know that if I keep postponing the delivery of my speech projects, the year would have ended without me making any progress at all and I would have thrown away a perfectly good opportunity to further advance my learning on public speaking. So here I am.

3rd, FILL ANOTHER PERSON’S BUCKET. In the book entitled “How Full Is Your Bucket” by Tom Rath and Don Clifton, the metaphor of a “dipper and a bucket” was used to suggest that each person carries an invisible bucket of emotions, along with a dipper, which they can use to either add to other people’s buckets or to dip from them. Their research contends that filling someone else’s bucket benefits both parties – the person who gives the praise and the person who receives it.

Providing constructive evaluation for a newbie’s icebreaker speech is a perfect example of filling another person’s bucket. This results to the speaker feeling good and motivated to proceed to his next speech project. The evaluator also feels equally good for having “made” that person’s day.

4th, DECLUTTER. Clutter is a manifestation of procrastination. It exists because we’ve either put off making a decision about something, or because we’ve managed to make the decision but have not yet taken action.

Procrastination drains us of purposeful energy. Thus, it feels so liberating and exhilarating to declutter. By cleaning up our physical mess, we say goodbye to the negative energy and welcome the good vibes. The space we create encourages mental clarity.

And so I have also started the ultra-distasteful task of cleaning up my rather messy room. This involves putting away outdated magazines and travel brochures, consolidating important documents scattered here and there, and repositioning some pieces of furniture. I am glad though because it shows that I’m ready let go of my past baggage and embrace new possibilities.

5th, MEDITATE. Empty your mind from time to time whenever you feel stressed. Visualize yourself in a peaceful quiet scene in nature and relax your entire body. “Inhale vitality, exhale tension” as the Yogilates intructor at Slimmers would put it. Cast out your worries and refill them with positive and inspiring thoughts. Repeat this process as often as you can and you’ll find that peace of mind comes by easily.

So how can you tell when you’re achieved peace of mind? Well, you’ll know it because you become CLEAR more and CONFUSED less, you LAUGH more and FROWN less, you BELIEVE more and DOUBT less, you ACT more and PONDER less, and you TRUST more and WORRY less. I challenge everyone to practice these techniques in order to attain what some people may consider as the thing that they want most of out life.

Madam Toastmasters, fellow toastmasters and guests, good evening.

-taken from my Basic Speech Project #3-